Lost Dreams

Dreams are meaningful and achievable, but what happens to the dreams we lose sight of, the dreams that take second place?

Two of the dreams that I’ve lost over the years were the goal of become fluent in other languages and the dream of looking beautiful by achieving beauty standards.

Learning languages

I remember going to French classes in community college excited for class. I loved how Madame Sullivan taught us to pronounce words like boulangerie, one of my most favorite things in the world. Did someone say bread?

I only took two courses with her, and that was the end of a structured and formal language-learning experience. Languages continued to spark my interest.

Throughout the years, I’ve attempted to learn other languages through Youtube videos, Duolingo, and Mango Languages but never with the discipline I had when taking those French classes. The dream of becoming fluent in other languages was lost, if only until that dream takes first place again.

Looking “beautiful”

Photo by Lisa Fotios from Pexels

Looking beautiful is subjective because we see beauty differently. Beauty depends on culture, time periods, and preferences.

There’s a video called “Beauty Standards Around the World” which shows the differences in how we perceive beauty. A woman asks people from around the world to photoshop her photo and make her beautiful. Some go for made-up looks while others keep her face natural.

Looking beautiful had been, if not one of my conscious goals, a subconscious one. I found myself surrounded by people judging others and me on all types of things like weight, clothes, hair, and nails.

Over the years, I’ve known the pain of getting my lip waxed and eyebrows threaded. Looking beautiful means painful, expensive, and time-consuming experiences of which most of time I have no patience or interest for.

I have a big nose that I have no intention of ever having surgery on. So looking “beautiful” in the eyes of society became another lost dream.

If there was a lesson from this lost dream, it helped me redefine “beauty” to include the beauty that radiates from within as cliche as it sounds. Beauty shines through our eyes, personalities, and actions.

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